1.5/5 popcorns

Cast: Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown

‘Paranormal Activity’ only becomes better and scarier in a theater full of squirming teens, half-sobbing and half-peeing. And ‘The Room’ turns into a genuine work of art when you have friends taking shots with you every time Tommy Wiseau’s saggy backside appears onscreen.

In short, an audience can make watching complete slop a little more manageable.

Such is the case for ‘Project X,’ an obnoxious exhibit of jackassery that hopes to offer a fresh take on the tired, out-of-control house party story. And with sex, drugs and alcohol aplenty, it’s no wonder the theater was packed with college bros eager to take part in — if not draw inspiration from — its debauchery.

Unfortunately, the audience was the only aspect of the experience that made the movie worth watching. Seriously, if you’ve never been in a crowd that cheers for topless bouncy houses or groans at a testicle-punchingdwarf, then you’re missing out.

Otherwise, this is just another get-popular-or-die-trying high school fantasy. Sweet and unassuming Thomas (Thomas Mann) is turning 17, and his abrasive best friend Costa (Oliver Cooper) is throwing him a legendary birthday party that will, it is hoped, make them celebrities. And to round out this trio of clichés, Jonathan Daniel Brown stars as J.B., the butt of everyone’s jokes and the outsider in this group of nobodies. Apparently, Michael Cera, Jonah Hill and Christopher Mintz-Plasse couldn’t make it this time around.

Played by young low-profile actors, Mann, Cooper and Brown could’ve given the movie some actual adolescent sensibility. Instead, they’re just some thickheaded jerks hoping to get laid and wasted.

‘Project X’ begins with Thomas’ parents conveniently leaving town to celebrate their wedding anniversary, leaving the house with a pool and a sizeable backyard. As expected, their laundry list of warnings goes unnoticed. Stay out of the office? Answer every phone call? Please. That would only get in the way of the boozy mayhem, all caught on film thanks to a mostly unseen cameraman named Dax (Dax Flame).

As one might expect, the found-footage gimmick quickly outstays its welcome within the first five minutes. It didn’t do much for ‘Cloverfield,’ and it doesn’t do much here — unless it purposefully aimed to instill the same sense of nausea in its audience as it did in its partygoers. In which case, the shaky cam is a rousing success.

Though the night starts off slowly, the party guest list eventually snowballs to more than a thousand party rocking teens — thanks mostly to Costa’s guerilla invites all over the Internet and local radio stations. At first, Thomas timidly resists. But a couple of shots and some ecstasy later, he’s fearless in a classic party-god-on-the-rooftop scene. With helicopters circling overhead, the riotous bash is soon broadcast on the evening news.

And that’s when things start getting really unbelievable.

Produced by ‘The Hangover’ director Todd Phillips, ‘Project X’ isn’t as much of a comedy as it is a big screen adaptation of ‘Girls Gone Wild’ with traces of ‘Superbad’ ambition. Yes, the bras go flying, but there’s also the vague adolescent desire for thrills and beer that seems slightly familiar. At least in the first half of the movie.

But as soon as dwarfsstart busting out of ovens and the neighborhood literally goes up in flames, the movie loses touch with its audience. I’m guessing not many of us have gone to a party busted by a SWAT team and a crazed drug dealer armed with a flamethrower.

To be fair, you don’t need to believe movies like this to have fun. Even the most ridiculous ones wind up being a little bit more accessible if there are characters we can invest in. After all, McLovin did a pretty good job of making us care in ‘Superbad.’ But that’s where ‘Project X’ fails most. Though it was nice to think that the college kids in the theater were beyond hoping to get laid and wasted, I’m sure that won’t stop them from trying.

dataroy@syr.edu